The fact that Mrs. Samantha Gorgeous’ London mansion would be the primary provider of patients for St. Vincent’s Hospital in the happy twenties has a logical explanation. On the Social Season, Mrs. Gorgeous used to organize high society balls. And although the assistants were warned that they should crouch down every sixteen minutes punctually, many forgot such a healthy advice. But “what was going on at Mrs. Gorgeous’ mansion?” you’re probably wondering. Quite simply: a marble statuette depicting the pathetic scene of a too short jockey trying unsuccessfully to climb onto a too tall horse, orbited the gigantic crystal chandelier in the middle of the ballroom. The orbit was elliptical and every sixteen minutes the statuette would fall to the level of the heads. Whether it was due to the jockey’s frustration or to a more plausible circumstance (there was a large supply of Scotch whiskey in the cellar), the fact remains that the statuette had been orbiting the ballroom’s chandelier since the turn of the century, when the mansion was built. So much so that the old London great men of the time all had scars on their heads from the treacherous impact of the statuette. Mrs. Gorgeous uselessly hired the services of numerous exorcists and sorcerers in hopes of getting rid of that hassle. Finally, she provided herself with a hunting shotgun and, in a frenzy, knocked down the statuette. Curiously enough, the next day she was the one orbiting the chandelier.
