THE EXTRATERRESTRIAL ORIGINS OF MODERN ART (Chapter 8)

In the Montmartre ‘préfecture de police’ is kept the record of an interrogation carried out in Le-Bateau-Lavoir four days after the cumbersome abduction’s incident. Two police officers did turn up without warning. It was noon and all the artists slept or lay in a comatose state, exception made of Jean Metzinger, who was “stabbing cucumbers” according to the police report (although Metzinger always maintained that he was cutting them into slices.) Here is the brief transcript of the interrogation:
“Complaints have been received from neighbors. Apparently, a saucer-shaped flying machine was reportedly perched for more than thirty minutes on the roof of this house on the 7th of this month.
“The questioned person reacts vehemently as if possessed:
“Is it my fault that a space vehicle landed on the rooftop? Is this my fault?!
“Why did you not immediately notify the préfecture?
“Would you have believed me?
“Of course not!
“Well, there you have the answer. And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to finish (sic) welding my ass to my body.”
So far the transcript of the interrogation, which is reported to have been abruptly interrupted as a consequence of the sudden spontaneous combustion of one of the police officers. The report ends by saying that Jean Metzinger did not stop blowing a pinwheel throughout the interview.
Image: MONTMARTRE, BY MAURICE UTRILLO

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