SANDWICHES

In May 1936, a couple was having a picnic by the Pond in Central Park. They were eating peanut butter sandwiches while chatting and pampering. Everything was fine until only one sandwich remained. The two rushed over it, but their heads clashed. Then a tense discussion ensued about who had the right to eat that last sandwich. The woman, who was a lawyer for Baumann & Persky, brought up a paragraph of the Constitution that, according to a lax interpretation, empowered her to eat that last morsel. On the other hand, the man, who was a devout Jew, alleged a dark chapter of the Mishnah concerning the right of primogeniture. But their arguments do not matter to us. The relevant thing is what happened with the sandwich while both were discussing. According to the testimony that the couple later gave to the police, a sea monster emerged from the water and, stretching its long neck, snatched and ate the remaining sandwich, diving into the pond immediately afterwards.
It was not the first case of these characteristics that reached the ears of the authorities. In fact, the rumor had spread that there was a monster in the Pond that would steal sandwiches. However, the authorities would not pay much attention to this kind of cases that were considered ‘junk cases’ and used to be entrusted to the agency Enigma Consultants S. L, which was a sort of landfill for junk cases to the authorities. But let’s get to the point. To elucidate what was true in the statements of the Jewish couple about a sea monster that had snatched the last sandwich from their picnic basket, Michael Schlimazl and Jacob Schlemihl decided to reproduce the conditions in the midst of which the event took place. So, they organized a picnic at about the same time and at the same point on the Pond’s shore; they spread out a tablecloth and sat down on the grass to eat peanut butter sandwiches. And when only one sandwich was left, they pretended to argue over it. However, what started off as a feigned argument, soon began to get out of hand. That a fake situation slowly becomes a true one is, unfortunately, more common than one might think. (Take the case of the corrupt labor unionist Jimmy Hoffa, who disappeared while playing peekaboo with the mafia boss Anthony Provenzano.) TO BE CONTINUED